Just when I thought that Kangaroo Jack and The Country Bears were the low points in Christopher Walken's career and Cruising and Revolution were the low points in Al Pacino's...I had to see Stand Up Guys....a truly boring and ludicrous film that doesn't know whether it wants to be a gangster comedy, a drama, a thriller or a plain action film. Despite the presence of three of my favorite actors---Walken, Pacino and Alan Arkin...there is nothing appealing about this film.
The film follows Val (Pacino) and Doc (Walken) through one rambunctious night on the town. Val has just been released from jail and Doc wants to show him a good time. All the while...they break their friend Hirsch (Arkin) free from a nursing home.
Perhaps the thought of three geriatric gangsters played by three highly acclaimed actors sounds funny to you. It's not. When it tries to be funny...it fails miserably. However, it rarely tries to be funny because it's too busy mixing genres much too often. One scene is violent, the next attempts to be funny and the next attempts to be sad. It's a vicious cycle. It's almost as if first time writer Noah Haidle and director Fisher Stevens (who you may remember as Ben from the Short Circuit movies) couldn't find any kind of rhythm to go with the film so they tried everything in the book.
Also...every character in this film is completely unrealistic. Val is a stuck-up gangster with a heart of gold. Doc is just trying to look for someone to help guide him through the rest of his life. Hirsch is an old man who doesn't know that cars now have buttons to make them start but can still thoroughly satisfy three young ladies' sexual needs. All of these traits are ones that I didn't buy for a second. As well...am I really supposed to feel for these characters when all of them are unlikable in one way or another? I don't think so.
You'll hear a very familiar quote from an obscure 80's film in Stand Up Guys. This is not because the people involved in the making of this film thought it might be funny. Rather...it's because they ran out of ideas far too early in the film. The 45 minutes or so of trying to find something...anything to happen in the film all lead up to the obligatory conclusion. Badly directed, edited, acted, written, produced, costume designed and anything else you can think of...Stand Up Guys is a lesson in not relying on your talented actors to carry a film.
(1/2 out of 5 Stars, The film is rated R for language, sexual content, violence and brief drug use)
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